That’s the thing about pain. It demands to be felt.
The Fault in Our Stars, John Green
It still feels a bit strange not to be in the other project. I officially rolled off from that account last Friday, but I still dip my hands in some of the things I left behind. Old habits die hard I guess.
I tried playing in this volleyball meetup up in Mason last night. OMG. I was completely caught off guard by the level of play they are in. I guess I can say that I experienced an A-level kind of play and that is really way out of my league. It was just too much for me to be honest. As usual, it was a bit awkward (since it’s my first time going there knowing no one) and a bit unnerving because they are so good and I had to step up a bit (honestly, I was terrible last night). I’ll probably skip that meetup until the level goes down a bit, or my level goes up. The good thing about it is that it fueled me to focus more in improving my skills. I have this jump manual that I need to be seriously applying in my workout routine. Maybe a pet project while in Manila?
Speaking of Manila, I can’t believe that it’s almost there! The last time I went home (that’s weird to say) to the Philippines was in Jan 2012. So, it’s practically two years since my last visit. I’m really excited meeting with old friends, and family, but I’m kinda dreading the traffic, pollution and how things will be busy all the time to maximize the whole month. Let’s see how that will play out, but I think the pro beats the con by a mile.
My friend Ronald suggested Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn as a good read and so it was. It’s one of the un-”put down”-able books that just grabs you. I love the writing style, and the story. [SPOILER INCLUDED] I love Amy and her patience, precision and shrewdness. She is brilliant, but still flawed. I’m amazed how patient she was and it’s something I’d like to emulate somehow — not the perfectly doling out punishments. [SPOILER END] And, a movie based on the book is being made by David Fincher (Fight Club, Girl with the Dragon Tattoo)! I wonder how that will turn out. Ben Affleck is going to be Nick. I’m still on the fence on that but we will see how that will turn out. I still need to read The House of Hades. It’s an easy read so I’ll just have to pick that up some time and finish it off.
As a friend, do you support blindly to his/her decisions, or are you honest enough to say, “I don’t think that’s the best idea”? That’s my conundrum of sorts when I deal with friends. My fault (I guess) is that I care too much and I would not want my friend to be in a bad position. At the same time, I don’t want to be the Debbie Downer by pointing out the holes, issues and risks. I am too invested in the lives of other people where I should not be.
I remember years ago that one of my closest friend had a boyfriend I disliked. I thought that he was just not good for her at all. As they say, love is blind and I’ll probably have to add deaf, tasteless and senseless. It was not just me, but our group was a bit disappointed with the choice. I think one time I told her that I did not like <insert name> as her boyfriend, but ultimately, she’s the one who’s gonna kiss him and not me. I was not living that horrible life in my head, but as a friend, I had to be there when she finally realizes the gospel truth. And yes she did. She cried it out, and we were there comforting her and making her feel good about herself.
Don’t be too involved, but be there. It’s not your life. More often than not, you are not really affected by any failed or successful consequence. Your friend owns that and s/he should be accountable enough to face the consequences of his actions. But, you do not leave him as well. Be there and you probably just have to pick up the pieces and drink the pain away, or throw an awesome celebratory party. Finally, you are a valid voice because you are friends. You have that bond and it’s meaningful. I would expect my friend to be honest enough to tell me if I’m messing up and I should be able to dish the same. I’d want him to tell me that something is not right or help me understand his thinking it’s a bad idea. If s/he can’t be honest to me, who else, right? But, I also don’t expect him to take my advice as the absolute correct answer. I am just one of the voices in his life and ultimately, the most important one is the voice in his heart and mind.
I just had a thought earlier — Ariella Arida might actually win the Miss Universe crown tomorrow. Last year, most people thought that Janine Tugonon was robbed by Miss USA Olivia Culpo. Many attributed it to the timing of the Sandy Hook tragedy where they said the US needed something positive to celebrate about. For this year’s Miss Universe, the Philippines is just trying to stand up again after 2013′s strongest typhoon hit the country. Similar to the circumstance last year, the Philippines need something to celebrate about as they try to stand up again.
As always, I’m rooting for Miss Philippines to win the crown. *crossing my fingers*
I got inspired by my friend Kathy in posting midweek entries chronicling thoughts, and things that have happened. I figured Thursday would be a good day since I should have 4 days in and another post on Sundays to cap off the week. The challenge as always is finding the inspiration in actually writing down my thoughts and making something out of my sometimes-boring life. Let’s see how long I can keep up with this because the idea is pretty good especially that I felt that I was not examining my life close enough. Hopefully, this will help me put things in perspective and enable me to really self-reflect.
- I decided to finally take the bus again going to Downtown. Since I took on the PM role for my CA project, I was working in PST hours and it did not make sense for me to catch the bus (last bus leaves at 8:15AM). Since my allocation lessened, and I am finally rolling off, I took the bus last Tuesday once again. It’s fun to get into my routine once again. I love taking the bus because it is so convenient and I can just relax not getting stressed with the traffic. I can also catch up in things I usually read — blog, magazines, Facebook, Twitter and book.
- I read an interesting article titled “When Being Alone Turns Into Loneliness, There Are Ways to Fight Back” from WSJ. It’s a pretty good read and it actually hit home a bit. I’ve been known to be having bouts of loneliness. Being alone and single here in the US can be tough and you get to overthink sometimes. It’s good to know that being lonely is normal. A striking quote here is this — “You are creating the experience of loneliness by how you are thinking and behaving.” I’d say I’m on the right track when I was trying to be content/happy even when alone. I just need to do this more and be more grateful.
- I think my game is really improving lately. I’ve been consistently training in the gym, and I’ve been adding more plyometric exercises by doing Step Aerobics. I feel better and quicker in the court lately. I guess that’s working. I’m dreading that I’m gonna be ruining all the progress because of my vacation, but that’s the opportunity cost I am willing to pay just to see friends, family and experience a Filipino Christmas/New Year once again. I can’t wait.
One of my favorite treats during the Christmas season is Tsokolate Eh. I would remember my dad waking me up for Noche Buena, and we will always have the staple Tsokolate Eh, Excellente Ham and Hizon’s cake. These are the three things that I grew up with during Christmas that I sorely missed when I spent 2 Christmases here in Cincinnati. Since I’m going home this December, I’m really looking forward to continue on with tradition — have my cup of Tsokolate eh, a slice of Hizon’s cake and servings of Excellente Ham sandwiches. As for now, I have to contend with my version of Tsokolate Eh and get excited with my upcoming trip!
I can’t believe that it’s already November! I have not blogged much in October and it is such a shame because I had some emotional ups and downs that I should have written down. Oh well, the moment has passed but knowing my life, they will come back for sure. But, in general, October has been very good to me. After I got home from California on Oct 5, I did not have to fly again! I was able to do my old routine again. A change perhaps would be an impromptu trip to Indianapolis to finally see the city before the weather becomes too cold. The fall colors are starting to come in as the trees change their color. I finally switched doctors – both PCP and dental – so I do not have to drive to West Chester. What else? I think that’s it pretty much that’s kinda interesting.
Now that it’s November, I’m sorta panicking a bit. I’m flying out to the Philippines for my vacation, but I feel that I’m not yet ready with all the things I need to buy/pack/sort out. I’m also flying one last time to California for 4 days for some project celebration activities. Yes, I’m celebrating that! Between that, I have roughly just around 3 weeks to sort everything out. Some things have been purchased already, but I know I still need to do some more shopping for things I need to bring to the Philippines. I have to be mindful though with the cost since December might bleed me dry financially. Oh well, I did not really do a big vacation this year so that’s that now.
Since the year is about to close, it’s also the time to start on planning out 2014, and also have a review on what I have accomplished in 2013. It’s still a work in progress, but I’m already excited about 2014! Of course, I do not really know yet how the year will pan out eventually, but there are just possible good things that will and might happen next year. As a teaser (nothing set in stone yet) for things I’m looking forward to, here’s a rundown:
- Book of Mormons in January!
- A new role back in my first account at work. It’s good to be back!
- SF Pride and Chicago trip with Danuel
- A possible 1-week vacation to London
- Maybe finally have my PERM approved and go to Step 2 with the GC process
- Joining a volleyball league